Think about it, if you cannot accept who you are AS you are today, how can you expect to plot a course for change?

Barb at the bank stated that she likes to be able to eat whatever she wants. “If I see it and I want it, I want to be able to have it.” She has been on a soup diet the last few months which, she says, is working; but, she admits, she is getting bored.

“This is not me. I was always very skinny.” Now in her thirties, she still envisions herself as the teen and twenty-something who could easily eat whatever whenever and keep a little figure.

But that is not her reality today.

Accepting where you are right now is a key element for success. Do not judge yourself by a standard or system that worked years ago. If it is not working, you need to accept that and THEN make choices that honor the person you are today.

For example, Barb may very well have been able to eat whatever she likes…but not anymore. She is older and, if she indulges h

er impulses, she will continue to gain weight.

Wishing and hoping for the past to continue into today is like living in fantasy-land; it won’t get you where you want to go. It only brings you:

• anger that you are no longer enjoying what you used to be able to enjoy,
• disappointment over life’s twists and turns, and
• frustration at your seemingly powerless position.

Living in the past doesn’t change the past OR the present; it makes you feel miserable, unhappy and will not serve you to create the future you desire.

Accept your current reality. This is where your power lies. Where you ARE may not be where you WANT to be. That’s fine. It is your starting point; it doesn’t matter where that is.

We are taking baby steps forward on a new path, starting a new life, and creating change that feels good and brings us joy and fulfillment.

Castles were not built in a day; we will lay one brick at a time.

Your partner for CHANGE,

Coach Julie, RN ~ Nurturing Your Success

PS- Need strategies and support for creating change in your life? Schedule a free coaching session to learn how coaching can help you succeed. What are you waiting for? Life won’t wait.

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1)      Make a List.

Make a list of the roles you play in life – parent, spouse, sibling, homeowner/renter, borrower, employee, neighbor, friend, housekeeper, citizen, breadwinner, etc. You also have a role in maintaining your health and fitness as well as your finances and cooking for your family. What other roles do you play?

Look at your list; consider how you WANT to be known in each role.

• What are the qualities or characteristics you want to espouse in those roles?
• What’s important to you?
• What do you value?
• How do you want to FEEL in each of these roles?

This disconnect between what you THINK is important and how you behave is where you become very stressed. Juggling your roles and the expectations you have for delivering perfectly in each role creates stress and unhappiness.

…Especially when you have not stopped to consider what you value – what’s important to you as you play each role!

By constantly thinking you should be somewhere else doing something else and beating yourself up for not being a better parent or child to your parents or neighbor, you are not present for what you are doing. You cannot possibly be happy in the moment.

Your goal is to be at choice with how you spend your time and be fully present for it. THIS is how we find happiness and peace and self-acceptance…

For example, I spent many years thinking about my health and fitness but not doing very much. My story of having overcome an illness was guiding my behavior because it was louder and more powerful than any of the other thoughts I had about health. I also had occasional flare ups, which reinforced my feelings of powerlessness. I “reacted” when I would get sick and thought that I was a passenger, powerless to do anything to change my situation.

Until I decided I no longer liked playing this role. It no longer served me. I had better reasons to be healthy and was tired of being sick and at the mercy of these attacks.

What IS the role I want to play in my health and fitness? I want to retake my power and I BELIEVE I can find ways to empower myself and be healthy. I can be proactive in how I spend time and decrease the likelihood of being ill in the future.

2)      Define the Role.

• How important is this role in your life?
• What does it mean to you?
• How much energy and time are you willing to focus on each role?

By knowing this, it will be easier to make choices about how to spend your time.

Do you stay late at work or do you go home to cook for your family? Do you get up with the alarm and work out or do you sleep a few more minutes? Do you take a walk or play a game with your daughter or do you watch TV?

There are no right or wrong answers, so please don’t judge yourself. And an answer you give today may be different tomorrow when circumstances change. But, the question is, “Who’s in charge: YOU or are you at the mercy of your thoughts and your stories?”

For example, if my health and fitness is now a priority, then I need to move it up on the list in terms of importance. In other words, it comes first, not last and I get up with the alarm.

3)      Take Action Steps.

In order to create change you must eliminate what doesn’t fit to create space and then add what does. Take baby steps –

• What one thing can you do today to either eliminate or add something to your life that would be of value to you?

Take the time to consider the roles you play and what is important to you in each of your roles. Evaluate whether you are living up to your own ideals and then, take steps to change. By doing so, you become empowered, become more productive,  and you’ll be happier than you dreamed possible.

Your partner for success,

Coach Julie, RN ~ Nurturing Your Success

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Resistance comes in many forms such as self-doubt, procrastination, and excuses. Creativity can be stifled in many ways but it is just Resistance in disguise.

Regardless of whether you are an artist, Resistance shows up in your life too. Call it Resistance or Fear, whatever you call it, it stops you from achieving success. It interferes with completing your goals – or following through with whatever your heart is longing for.

You want to lose weight, change jobs, start a new business, run a marathon, get married, buy a house, write a book - YOU WANT CHANGE – but your fear, or “Resistance”, creeps in. And it can be so subtle…

…Or it can hit you like a lightning bolt.

Often fear shows up in the form of excuses or rationalizations. You can come up with some really good reasons as to why you can’t, haven’t, and won’t. It is not your fault; it is your *fear* which holds you back.

So, who’s in charge here? Who will win this battle for control?

There is an inner enemy that lives in your mind and it is essential you recognize how it shows up for you – in all its many ways. Knowing this will empower you.

Awareness is powerful because then you can choose – you have to choose to grow bigger than your fear.

When you know your fear and how it shows itself, then you can decide *consciously* how you want to proceed. Will you let Fear have his way? Or will you push through in spite of this fear?

Change requires courage and faith. And the path to any real success will mean a few skinned knees. You have to be willing to push through and take the punches. Dust yourself off and keep moving toward your goal. This will increase your self-confidence and fortify your commitment.

If you don’t have the strength to go on, then maybe the goal is not worth fighting for or maybe the timing if wrong. Reevaluate your commitment, your resources, your values and your reasons for continuing. If you don’t see the value in the outcome, if the vision is fuzzy, if life has changed and this path no longer serves you, then let it go and choose a new goal. But don’t let fear win.

Here are some strategies for success:

• Know your path and why your traveling it.

• Have faith that if you continue to take another step you will succeed and the universe will support your efforts.

• Recognize Fear, face it, and walk through it.

• Garner support from your allies to assist you along the way.

• Expect fear – he is always there. His job is to keep you from achieving success.

• YOUR job is to succeed in spite of him.

Your partner for success – and FEAR slayer -

Coach Julie, RN ~ Nurturing Your Success

PS Would you like support for facing YOUR fear to achieve success? Schedule a free coaching session today to learn how coaching can benefit you.

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A successful life is nothing more than a series of successful days strung together.

~ Earl Nightengale

This is a wonderful definition of a successful life. It’s too easy to get sidetracked and seduced by grand thoughts about what a successful life should be.

In reality, it is the little things you do day by day, inch by inch – doing the things that you enjoy, with the people you enjoy, paying attention to what is most important to you – that will become a life that you feel good about living.

We know that tomorrow is not guaranteed but how often do we use that as an excuse for our bad behavior or for not following through with something we have promised?

How often do we put ‘the chase’ above and beyond our own happiness? We find ourselves running this race we call life and yet, what for? So we can reach the finish line sooner?

No thanks!

Living each day in a way that feels good, with integrity, on purpose toward a meaningful goal, experiencing joy and the love of others, keeps you in the present – which is the only place happiness lives.

What would a successful day look like or feel like for you?

Would you do the things you do now? Would you treat people the way you do? Would you put up with all you put up with today?

What would need to happen to make every day a success? Start today.

Your partner for success,

Coach Julie, RN ~ Nurturing Your Success

P.S. Set up your free coaching session today. Let’s create a strategy for your happiness and success.

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Together, let’s explain fear so we can better understand its purpose and learn some strategies for moving beyond our fear and creating greatness!

This free teleclass is on Tuesday, 3/16 from 7-8pm Eastern Time. Hope you can join us!

Your partner for success,

Coach Julie, RN ~ Nurturing Your Success

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The list goes on and on. But, as we all know, even with the best intentions, New Years Resolutions fade after a few short weeks – if not a few days!

There are several reasons for this.

1) Most of the resolutions we make for ourselves at New Years are not real goals but rather they are “shoulds”. You “should” lose those few pounds. You “should” be promoted. You “should” make amends with your mother. You “should” treat your husband or wife better. You “should” quit smoking.

But you don’t really want to.

2) Perhaps you’re really not clear about what it will actually take for you to succeed at the resolution. This means you don’t have a clear plan of action outlining the necessary steps required.

If you don’t know what to do, how can you expect to follow through?

3) Change requires effort. It requires that you change something about yourself, not just your circumstance. You generally have to improve and develop yourself in order to make the change happen.

And you don’t want to do the work. Not a bad thing – this is not about judging you. The reality is simply that you are not yet willing to do the work required to make the change. It’s much easier to accept this about yourself rather than give yourself a hard time.

4) Many goals – especially New Year’s resolutions – are often made abruptly, without much thought or visioning.

If you don’t know what you really want, how can you expect to get there?

Setting a goal or making a New Year’s Resolution needs to be done with thought and consideration. Choosing the wrong goal based on someone else’s ideas of who you should be or made out of guilt or shame will not be enough of a motivator to get you off your duff to do the work needed to accomplish your goal.

So what DOES it take to achieve success with your New Year’s Resolutions? Well, with any goal there is ONE KEY INGREDIENT that can make or break your success.

Join us for a FREE Teleclass *TONIGHT* January 11, 2010 from 7-8pm Eastern Time to learn more about succeeding at your goals this year. REGISTER HERE.

You can also read more of this article here…

Your partner for success,

Coach Julie ~ Nurturing Your Success

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Without a direction to head, you will float and your ship will sail wherever the wind blows.

When the years go by and you say to yourself “Where has the time gone?” this means you’ve not set your course for success. You’re sailing through life without a direction.

If you consider what you might want to accomplish this year, then you can focus your efforts and take the steps required to make that vision a reality. Do this each year and you live your life on purpose, with meaning and intention.

Success doesn’t happen by chance. It needs to be actively CREATED.

And so does a great life. It, too, needs to be CREATED.

But first, you need to envision what you want. What do you want to celebrate at the end of 2010?

Think of vision as a beacon that lights your way to the shore.

Then, you can create a map to getting there.

Here are the steps for achieving success in leadership and in any area of life:

1. Strategic Vision
2. Projects (or Goals)
3. Plan
4. Details
5. Action
6. Follow through

To learn more about these steps, read the article Leadership Strategies: A Productivity Model.

To add to the inquiry, contemplate how you want to FEEL this year.

What do I mean?

• Well, perhaps you’d like more peace of mind, or security, and less fear.
• Or perhaps you are interested in more joy – an increase in the ability to feel happy and be fully present in the NOW while experiencing less stress and worry about the future (or guilt/shame about the past).
• Maybe you want to feel more confident and experience less anxiety and self-doubt in how you communicate and in the choices you make.
• Maybe you just want more love in your life and less frustration, anger and conflict.

We all want to FEEL something – what might that be for YOU??

Again, by asking yourself these questions and taking a few moments to consider your responses, you start to focus your efforts so that you can begin to achieve these dreams and turn your vision into reality.

This is how the brain operates to support your desires and your efforts.

Once you identify something you want to achieve, your brain starts to figure out ways to bring it into being. The brain does not like incongruencies. It wants reality TO BE the fantasy and it will start processing incoming information in order for you to take the steps required to bring the incongruence into alignment.

So consider what you’d like to DO this year and how you’d like to FEEL.

Let me know what you come up with.

I look forward to working with you to create an AMAZING 2010!

Your partner for success,

Coach Julie ~ Nurturing Your Success

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With your rich feedback, we have developed a four session teleconference series titled “Creating Amazing Relationships.” The series starts on Thursday, January 21, at 7 PM – 8 PM and will continue for the next three Thursday evenings: January 28, February 4 & the 11^th.

The topic seems so important and there is so much interest we decided to price the series at $77.00, a price we hope everyone can afford. That is not $77.00 each session but $77.00 in total. Registration will open on January 8th!

Kick off the New Year right –

Be sure to join us for a free conference call 

Making and Keeping Your Commitments in 2010 

Monday January 11th, at 7 PM eastern time  

To Register simply CLICK HERE

Happy New Year! Together, let’s make 2010 your best year yet!

Your Coaching Partners for Success,

Julie and Teresa

Julie@NurturingYourSuccess.com

Teresa@U2ThePowerofU.com

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Monday, January 11, 2010 at 7pm Eastern Time, you’re invited to a free call: with Coaches Julie & Teresa where, in one hour, you’ll learn the keys to Making and Keeping Your Commitments in 2010.

To register, visit www.NurturingYourSuccess.com and click the Sign Up for an Event button.

During the teleclass, you’ll also learn all the details of the upcoming “Creating Amazing Relationships” series and how to register.

Here’s what people are saying about the Amazing Relationship TeleClass Series:

Needing to be right can be very difficult for me! With increased awareness, it’s easier now to have better conversations with less stress and friction. ~ Diane

I just posted a blog about it. You can read about it HERE:

What ARE the Keys to Amazing Relationships?

Be sure to post your comments and provide us with feedback about what you are looking for in your relationships – what challenges do you have?

To register for the FREE teleclass Monday, January 11th on Making and Keeping Commitments in 2010, visit www.NurturingYourSuccess.com and click the Sign Up for an Event button.

We look forward to working with you to make 2010 your best year yet!

Your Coaching Partners for Success,

Julie and Teresa ~ Nurturing Your Success

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They may sound like:

• “It will be so wonderful when…”
• “I cannot wait until…”
• “If only life was…”

Daydreaming is a function of the systemic mind. This function allows us to envision different scenarios for ourselves and our lives. When done purposefully and intentionally, this affords us the opportunity to create goals and set direction for our lives. This is good.

The problem is that we can get stuck in thoughts about the future and miss what is wonderful about this moment – even if it is a challenging moment in life. There are rich lessons and opportunities in difficult times.

In addition, when you waste time wishing things were over or different, you give your power away falling into powerlessness. There is no power to create an impact when living in dreamland.

It was a moment of awareness when a client realized that when her children were young, she was always wishing things were different. When they were little, she wished they were older. She couldn’t wait until they went to school. When they were in school, she was looking ahead at the teenage years. When they were teens, she was excited about college. She was always looking ahead at the next stage of the journey. She loved being a mom, but now that her kids are grown and starting families of their own, she wishes she could go back in time so she could savor those moments with her children. She wishes she hadn’t spent so much time of her life wishing life was different.

NOW is all you have to experience happiness. Life is happening right now.

Learning to live in the here and now and appreciate all that is in front of us is often difficult. Yet, it is the most important lesson we have to learn. It is at the heart of enjoying and fully experiencing life.

Today, notice how much time you spend thinking about how life will be “when.”

Let me know what you discover.

Your partner for success,

Coach Julie ~ Nurturing Your Success

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