Do You Practice What You Teach?
The teacher often teaches what he/she most needs to learn. But are you open to your own lesson?
A therapist just got engaged-a second marriage. Thoughts about planning the wedding make her overwhelmed and stressed. So she doesn’t think about it. There is no date set yet.
Other examples of this disconnect between what you do for a living and what you practice in your own life include:
- The overweight doctor teaching his patients about nutrition
- The nurse who smokes teaching others about living a healthy lifestyle
- The accountant who owes back taxes
- The leader who cannot confront poor performance
- The manager who won’t delegate
There are thousands of ways that incongruence can show up in our lives. One client recently discovered that while she is a powerful leader at work, she does not practice her leadership skills at home and feels quite disempowered, disrespected and unhappy in that environment.
While it may be unconscious to you, living with this incongruence causes you stress.
You are out of integrity, and in a myriad of ways, you try to hide this fact. Hiding always creates stress as we lie to ourselves and others. We put on a mask to cover up the fact that we are not doing what we need to do to be okay with ourselves – and we hope other people don’t ‘find out’ our little secret.
Incongruence, being out of integrity with what you believe to be the ‘right thing’ – especially something you teach others – causes you pain.
You make choices to take a job or you mark out a career path because it’s what you enjoy learning about and teaching others. But you must never become so wise, so dignified, so impatient, so powerful that you cannot be open to new ways of applying what you know AND learning new perspectives.
Life is filled with lessons. Lessons are often presented to us with strong emotions attached. When you experience a strong emotion such as fear or anger or anxiety or even excitement, there is opportunity to take a fresh look at the situation and learn how to navigate it from a position of strength.
These discrepancies in your life provide you with opportunities for personal development and growth. Be on the lookout!
Feelings of “overwhelm”, for instance, offer this therapist – someone often in a position to teach others how to deal with anxiety – a perfect opportunity to practice what she teaches.
Will she make this an opportunity to learn and grow beyond her debilitating anxiety – perhaps even learn to enjoy the journey?
Or will she succumb to her old habits and allow the stress and fear to overwhelm her? And while she will eventually plan a wedding, instead of enjoyment, she will travel this ‘life project’ with dread.
Where in your life could you use your own best teaching and advice?
Identify areas where you can become even better at what you do and find a teacher who can help you apply what you may already but know in new ways. Even the best of teachers make great students.
Your partner for success,
Coach Julie ~ Nurturing Your Success
